I cannot stand my father’s hand
Who wields a violent, tyrant’s glove
Sour bearer weakened and feeble
In the order of law I will no longer tolerate
Be still!
Beckoned and bruised
Full hatred, full of despise
Anarchy to which I worship, subscribe
While lanterns burn brightly in the corridors of my mind
Within an age when all things fair
I went too far!
I left the earth searching, pondering, praying
Aimless in my conquest
Never having been a saintly figure of the church
My martyrdom is inexplicable
I need not explain! I need exoneration!
Reverence for weirdness, vindication for oddity
Ptolemy reasoning and platonic figuring
A beast with severed Bristol ties
The master laughs when servants cry
Under the influence of insanity
And to my mother dressed in armor
Now murdered on the battlefront
I show thee no pity
Affectionless her body lay infested with her swollen anger
Her last words rang, “Scoundrel! Blasphemous borne child! Oh, how I loathe thee!”
Now a lecture for the worms … and worms have no ears
I scorn relatives with menopausal awareness
Shuffling halfheartedly toward the Golden Years of nothingness
My God, what am I doing here?
In a haze surrounded by speculation
Makes me strive for segregation
Triumph in the town of plenty
Redemption for a sparrow’s crown
Take from my bosom apologetic voices
Begging forgiveness for attending this menace
Pretend no more I’m a believer; infected with cursed heathen fever
Catching glimpses of amity from the corner of my eye
A million thoughts race through my head
Is true love real? Or truly stable?
Would true love flee if it were able?
Lovely little parody that here I sit among the ashes
Caressed by the sense of me sitting on a fence
Which way should I fall – to the bad or the good?
Why try? On which side will you die?
My fondness for people resembles a piccolo placed in the back row
Never been known, never was shown
False freelance no pay headwash mind games
Reserves me and my lonesome at no extra cost
My torturer, my devil, my nemesis, friend
A soft, quiet friend with a momentous impact
This is my montage – the last call
What manner lie you wake at night to sense a presence in the room?
A shadow’s breath on top of you emerging forth and spreading sickness
Confess, you wicked silhouette! ‘Twas you who hid within my room!
Watching me slumber with eyes tightly fused
Pray tell, what was I supposed to do?
Love you all as best I could?
I’ve already tried to entwine my benevolence
But to those who have misunderstood
I’m just a lost cause ‘twas meant for dogs whose dice roll just crapped out again
Forget I said a single word
What’s best unsaid is what I think
To you, to all, to worldly stays
‘Cause what I say turns blue skies grey
Pledged to oaths I can’t reveal
I’ll never heal and cannot translate
Those who go to bed with bloated bellies
Scrounging round for one last supper
Retire now!
Wash away covetous ways like disposing of bowel waste in an outhouse reserve
I refer to happiness in meager tones
For we have not yet been properly introduced
And if I told you of everything so vivid to me
A parade of raindrops that fall in the smash suddenness of silent contempt
My expressive salute to a parental cluster of amethyst that seems to shine upon my loose footing
Would you take back what you said to me?
Could you bring back the laughter escaping my lungs?
I’m on the run, you wanna come?
Hallelujah, what’s it to ya?
Seems to me much more than that
If Kipling wrote on shattered speeches
I know where the pieces went
And they’re for rent
Alas, the fall of twilight’s play
As black cloth falls, I’ll dim the lights
Although I love all when the dawn breaks
I am trapped in secret night
The last contender for the fight
It’s all right; I’ll be alright
It serves me right
Goodnight.
